Track Reviews of this year Part 1:

Houdini, Parking Lot, Lithonia, Not Like Us, No Face

Houdini

A track I was debating whether to review or not has finally found its place in this review. Houdini, for the goddamn trillion millionth tackles the idea of old Eminem or if you will “Slim Shady”. First of all, eminems voice still proves to be amusing, still managing to hold the charm of Slim Shady but the lyrics ehh not so much. But Ill get to that later.

The samples it uses utilize majority of the usual chord progressions found in his older music, but it just feels too forced. The once youthful spirit has reformed into a lingering stench that just refuses to die. Talking about the lingering stench, it fucking smells shit. Like dog shit. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Eminem literally cannot let his old self go and I don’t know if its better or for worse. Majority of the bars in this song (im using bars incredibly loosely) are so stupid but it goes to a point where I have to let it go.

If I had to analyse this song and nitpick it I could but this is just one of those songs where you switch your brain off and let Eminem remind you about a more racist version of him but still remaining like a tame little bitch. However, there are some bars which I do admit are pretty clever.

“My transgender cat is Siamese

Identifies as Black, but acts Chinese”

Fucking Gold.

All in all, Houdini is a pretty shit song lmao. But its good shit. The type of song where you just listen to the song for its energy and its bouncy instrumentals. It’s a song that I can jive with and pretend that I’m some edgy racist white man. And I love it. I expected this level of quality of Eminem so I’m not disappointed. It’s a 5.

Parking Lot

Sampling. Beautiful. Mustard has become one of my favourite producers this year, leading production on songs like Not Like Us (where ill get to later), and older tracks like Ballin’ by Roddy Ricch. Travis Scott’s usual psychedelic feel creates a poisonous atmosphere that transcends me to a higher level. Lyrics are a bit hard to hear but its not about the lyrics for a Travis Scott song. It’s about the feeling. And ye, it makes me feel a lot. Parking Lot is a strong 7.

Lithonia

Hopping back onto the Gambino train, Gambino shares with us his first track to his final studio album, Bando Stone and the Brave New World. Lithonia seems to be a passionate, moving, love song that yet again grows on me as a good song. Its stripped bareback instrumentals at the beginning of the track eases into full blown heavy guitar instrumentals backed with a fierce vocal performance from Gambino.

Its lyrics, although basic, carry waves as its stacked vocals create a beautiful collage of heartbreak stretching outwards to an open field of foolish love and pain. Gambino’s nobody gives a fuck mentality although wacky somehow blends with the harsh guitar and drums. Im honestly just gonna glaze the fuck out of this song because I love Gambino. Its just a 9.

Not Like Us

Clever, groovy, witty. A perfect 10. I forgot to write something here because I was too busy enjoying the music.

No Face

With every ten I give, theres always a fucking 1 out there. I was originally gonna give this song a 1 but I don’t wanna do Ghostface Killah like that. Its drums are punchy and its samples are quite reminiscent of Kanye’s older works. Killah’s rapping is brash, and bombastic, hard carrying this song and saving it from a 1. The chorus is really fun. But then motherfucking Kanye opens his mouth. Im not even gonna like analyse or nitpick what hes saying. Ill just show you these quotes so you can decide for yourself.

“Till I post-nut, cum to my senses”

“I was mad, I fucked her so hard, until she came clean”

“Got that new rrrt-, it’s a May-bay-bay”

And I know one of you fuckers are gonna be like “Oh theyre actually bars, you need context.” Bitch shut the fuck up and get off the copium.

At this point it settles the debate on whether he has ghost writers or not. You think fucking ghost writers would write this degenerate shit? Fucking think. No Face is a rough 3.